Picture above from Art Brut’s profile on rhapsody.comArt Brut formed in England in 2003 with the sole (and completely honorable) intention of getting girls and making it to Top of the Pops. The band took its name from a wayward group of outsider artists and immediately began banging out its own form of strongly opinionated, punked-up Brit pop. Their debut single, “Formed a Band,” informed everyone of their presence with lyrics like “Look at us/We’ve formed a band/We’re going to be the band that makes Israel and Palestine get along.” Led by the distinct Cockney snarl of Eddie Argos, the group corralled its simplistic art-punk urges in its full-length debut, 2005’s Bang Bang Rock And Roll.- Art brut’s profile on Rhapsody.com

I loved the name Art Brut- the ‘outsider’ connotations and Argos’ stage antics. On the band’s name and relevance to the group:

“I knew what the name meant when we started the band because it’s my favourite form of art, but the rest of them didn’t know. So every night we’re going on stage saying, ‘Hello, we’re Art Brut’ and I’d secretly be calling them unable to play and mad and stuff, without them really realizing. I mean, I can’t sing or anything. So I feel that we are that side to art.” (find original article here)

So i figured if there’s a band with a singer who’s declared himself unable to sing, there should be a franchise that ‘doesn’t’ sing. Or does the analogy actually sit this way- we’re a real estate agency with very mediocre agent skill-sets formed with the dual motivations of ‘making a lot of money’ and then ‘making even more money’. Am planning on the Art Brut +65 Franchise.

And today I realise why a certain(interesting looking) block of apartments that bear all the characteristic flourishes of Tang Guan Bee has not had a single unit for sale/rental on the market throughout the period that I’ve worked as an agent.

Apparently ex-remisier king Peter Lim owns the entire 11-storey block(as i extrapolate from the straits times article: 4 maisonettes and 1 5,000sqft penthouse, presumably over three floors):

The temporary link can be found here: :

Which is (really) not too bad a way to live-

Am actually looking for the OTHER clip where she screams out ‘Buddy Kane is King!’ as she defiles herself at open house but this, in this particular instance, works better.

Real estate agents/brokers- otherwise known as realtors

American Beauty- because apparently, if you’re defiling yourself with a realtor, there are different ways to call his name.

House of Sand and Fog surprisingly had no estate agent involvement. The characters sort of destroyed themslves and each other with scant outside help.

Anywhere but here- Divorced mom Adele(Susan Sarandon) is approached by an estate agent whose favourite pastimes include driving around, looking at the houses around Beverly Hills with her daugher(Natalie Portman), is approached by a realtor when she overheard their conversation in a bar. Realtor later becomes her friend.

The Sweetest Thing- Christina Walters(Cameron Diaz) has a thing for real estate agent Peter Donahue. There’s a bench in front of the church officiating Donahue’s wedding that reads- ‘Everything I touch turns to SOLD’.- which I thought was cool for an instant.

Disney’s ‘Haunted Mansion’- Eddie Murphy’s Jim Evers- “I’ve never met a deal I couldn’t love”. No- he did NOT sell the Haunted Mansion.

The architect-real estate agent pairing in Indecent Proposal- Woody Harrelson as architect husband, Demi Moore as real estate agent selling expensive Beverly Hills homes. Cliched ’80s story line has lao ah pek Robert Redford hounding Demi Moore at her estate agency and turning up at (very questionable) open houses. The photo above is of a slide show/prop that Woody Harrelson uses before pontificating about Louis Kahn and bricks.

Was it Scary Movie 3 that- in an Amityville Horror-inspired moment had an estate agent flush down a JuOn creature down the bath in his attempts to sell the house?

Have not watched Evan Almighty but Realty Times , Eve Adams is a syrupy sweet, caffeine-fueled agent who skips to work and sells Evan Baxter (Steve Carell) and family their monster home, sight-unseen, located in the exclusive Prestige Crest, and in the path of destruction.

Another movie fealturing a realtor according to Realty Times is : You Kill Me- with a far more entertaining realtor caricature- Dave(Bill Pullman- isn’t he the guy in Ghostbusters?) farms for listings in the mortuary. Methinks scanning the obituary would have done the trick but in Hollywood nothing beats a visit to your neighbourhood mortuary.

On TV:-

Edie Britt of Desperate Housewives – the only one with a semblance of a job, occasionally works as a realtor.

Help Me Help You- an episode where nympho Darlene Hunt, in a bid to advertise her real estate business, takes out an ad on the New York City bus that runs:’I'm Darlene, and I can move your unit’.

Carrie engaged the services of a realtor when she had to find an alternative to her rent-control apartment. The latter sniffed at the discordance between her limited budget and expectations.

Numerous appearances by estate agents on The Apprentice. Notable ones were: Kendra Todd, Season 3 Winner.

Jennifer Crisafulli- ex-Douglas Elliman, fired both on and off the air for her anti-Semitic remarks.

The camera that gave me the best, most inspired photos was a brandless(I’m sure it had a brand but it was one of them cheapies, bang-for-buck contraptions you get from Mustafa so for all intents and purposes- Muji) 4 megapixel camera.

Sure the flash is pathetic and photos taken under tungsten lighting turn out a jaundiced shade of yellow but the photos it turns out when lighting and good interiors converge are always (curiously), perfect- something my 8 megapixel canon with wide angle/adjustible iso’s and multi functions has yet to produce. Blamed it on being intimidated by the various functions initially but almost a year after, it’s still nowhere near as fun as that brand-less camera was/is.

Following that logical(?) progression, a DSLR(multi lenses, functions, controls) should tank. However, since this was an exercise in convincing myself that a DSLR could possibly be beneficial- am inclined to go the way of an Olympus. It’s supposed to be a good starter camera for novices, is panned by every photography purist out there but somehow, if the photos from skyscrapercity are anything to go by, has a signature blue hue in its photographs- a curious colour mix that somehow Canon just couldn’t replicate.

I like ‘em quirky and counter-intuitive.